WOMAN KNOW YOUR WORTH

  By Faith Monchusi
“A woman of Noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies” Proverbs 31:10

God spoke to me in regards to this scripture over years ago. He asked me, “Faith do you know how much you are worth to me?” He said to me, “I want you to spend more time with me. I want you to do everything I tell you to do. I want you to put me first in everything you do and let me guide you.”

You are reading this and wondering, “How did Faith get to have God speaking to her? How did she hear Him or know it was God?” My beloved friend, God is always speaking to us but if we are caught up in every day’s going in and going out we tend to not hear Him. If we are continuously chasing after self gratification we become numb to Him. I was also caught up in that noise as well, hearing Him but not listening to Him until I decided to be still and listen to God.

Girlfriend, do you know how much you are worth? I am not talking in monetary terms neither am I talking about how much you think your parents will ask for your lobola (bride price) when you get married. I am asking if you know how much you are worth to God who created you.

Most women do not know their worth and this is what puts women in the predicament or experiences of broken relationships and broken hearts. Not knowing your worth to God is what makes it easy for you to quickly loose yourself to a man who will not be there tomorrow. I am not saying it is wrong to fall in love but I want to share what God showed me and told me when I stopped looking for fulfilment in relationships and “friendships”.

The world will give you reasons and excuses for going in and out of relationships that leave more scarring than fulfilment. I know no one of you can really say a relationship that did not work out did not take something from you as a person especially if the relationship got physical in some way. The reasons or excuses I am referring to are: “Looking for a father figure in men you date.” Think about it; is that not an excuse to be promiscuous? Is that not an excuse to undermine God who is our eternal Father? God who is a father to the fatherless (Psalms 68:5) and a Father to all who believe (Romans 4:11).

I do not mean to be harsh but I am talking from what the Holy Spirit revealed to me. “Ok, there she goes again being all spiritual goody two shoes”, you think. Deciding to let go and let God take control and getting out of the noise and getting into His stillness opened my spiritual eyes and ears. The word of God says in Psalms 37:4 “Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart.” My desire was to hear God and know what He wants me to become. So I am still in the process for as long as I live.

Girlfriend, do you know what the Word of God says about your value to God? You did not fall from a tree, or sprout from the soil; you were bought with a price. That beautiful body that you believe men cannot get over is valuable to God. 1 Corinthians 6: 19- 20 “Do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you, whom you received from God? You are not you own; you were bought with a price. Therefore honor God with your body.
We all have somehow heard the part of this scripture (Your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit) even before we read it ourselves. God opened it for me and explained to me. I was amazed how much is said in this scripture. It was either incomplete or misinterpreted to me before. I was amazed that this scripture refers to sexual immorality more than what the world used it for by referring to body piercing and tattoos.

You are reading this and thinking, where is she going with this? You probably feel like I am going all over the place with what I am saying. Well I am still on track. I am just trying to open your eyes and mind in order for you to see your worth to God. Where does this scripture fit in? All women and even men want to be loved and the world has made it difficult for women to maintain or let alone know their worth to God. How? By bringing up this “dark” rule that “SEX SELLS”. We as women grow up thinking that being “sexy” is what makes us women. Because of that women’s sexuality is used to sell things. I have been a follower that rule as well and thank God for His grace I am freed from that lie of Satan and that is why my passion is to help renew the minds of women. There was time in my life where I appreciated being called “sexy” and “hot”. Spending time with God He told me that my child I want you to display my character in you on the outside and through how you carry yourself.

I used to love the shortest shorts and mini dresses until I listened to the Holy Spirit. I never really wore them to entice men but because since I am petite I looked cute in petite clothes. The more time I spent studying the word, spending long time in prayer, meditating on the word, reading spiritual books and spending more time feeding my spirit through going to church and listening to audio and TV sermons I learned more about my worth and how God wants me to carry myself here on earth. I have always loved church but I did not know the treasures in the Word of God that you will only find if you search the scriptures yourself (Joshua 1:8). I never used to make time to read the word because I did not know that it was significant. I was happy with the church sermons and have always shared what I learned but I deprived myself by not investing time in reading the word of God until I locked myself in my room and started reading the Word. That is when I had I got acquainted to the Holy Spirit.

GETTING ACQUAINTED

Do you know that the Holy Spirit is God Himself living in you?(1 Corinthians 3:16) 1 Corinthians 6:17 says “He who unites Himself to God is one with Him in Spirit.” How do you unite yourself to God? Through all those things I mentioned I did in the previous paragraph and continuously am still doing and will never stop doing as long as I live. When you put God first (Matthews 6:33) in your life because He has put you first before all creation(Genesis 1:28-29), when you become sensitive to the Holy Spirit and kill the flesh (Colossians 3:5; Ephesians 4:22-24) you become one with God, you get acquainted with God (1 Corinthians 6:17).
Killing the flesh is not really just about “sex” as maybe some might say; “But I am not fornicating.” The flesh is you, self- pleasure and self- gratification. Yes God does not say you must not have pleasure but that which brings pleasure to you does it bring pleasure to God? Is it in His will? Overspending money. Who gets first preference in your pocket? Beauty, hair, fashion and entertainment? Debts? Debts? Debts? If you put God first, even with your money through tithing and offerings He will protect and increase your money (Malachi 3:10).

Going back to how I dressed, the more acquainted I got with God through the Holy Spirit the more I started getting uncomfortable in mini dresses. The Holy Spirit even showed me how unattractive short dresses look on other young women. Now I see them as semi-naked and inviting the wrong attention. I said to God; “I was not wearing them to attract attention God but I just felt comfortable in them.” God told me that as a child of God you are not to cause others to sin. What you portray in your clothes make others judge you and it is a sin to judge. Revealing clothes cause men to lust and that is you causing them to sin.

Ladies I am sorry if you feel offended if you do reveal those parts of your body meant to be covered. You are not feeling offended, it is the Holy Spirit convicting you. Think about it, what excites you about showing your cleavage? Are you appealing to yourself or trying to evoke interest from men or are you trying to make yourself feel good that you have what some skinny women do not have? There you go, are you appealing to God or self?

All these things are some of the things that erode our worth as women. When a man asks you out the first time he meets you and you are wearing a short dress or low cut vest with your cleavage exposed out do you think he is interested in your intelligence or your body? Men are visual beings and their minds become like a scratched record. To them “First impressions last” forever. It will take you loosing yourself and removing your worth to God more in order to keep him in your life. Then you will be left crying when you hear he is getting married. When you see the woman he married you will go on how much the girl looks too old for him. What makes her look old? Is it because she is not showing skin?

WHERE DO YOU SPEND YOUR TIME?

Woman, know your worth. You are valuable to God because you were bought with a price (1 Corinthians 6:20). That price was the blood of Jesus Christ that was shed for me and you to be freed from the clutches of Satan and be freed from condemnation forever (Romans 8:31-34).
There are some places that are just not for beautiful daughters of God. I do not really have to name them because in your spirit you know them. You will say to me, “But I do not drink alcohol when I am there.” Girlfriend, over 90% of the people there are drinking so do you think they really think you do not drink? Do you know some people who are in these places who do not drink actually use some other things that get them in the mood of everyone else? So you are ok with being seen as a druggie?
The word of God says “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers” (2 Corinthians 6:14-15). Do not be those who come up with; Jesus hung out with sinners. You must search the scriptures yourself as the Bible also tells you to do so in order to get the real truth in the Bible. Jesus did not hang out in such places my love. He hung out with tax payers and prostitutes (Matthews 9:10-12) where everyone saw him. He did this to show them love as they were cast out by the Pharisees who saw themselves as too holy to hang out around these commoners (Luke 7:39).
Another worldly excuse to drink alcohol and abuse it is that Jesus Christ changed water to wine. God forbids drunkenness because He knows what it does to man’s sense of control(Ephesians 518). Why is it that people do not drink four cans of soft drink within two hours? Why is it different with alcohol? The excuse is that soft drink is too sweet. What about alcohol? Do you know how much carbohydrates are in alcohol? If you are one of those people fighting to loose weight but you drink alcohol, you are fighting a loosing battle. There are many benefits to quitting alcohol and loving yourself the way God loves you. The love of God renews you spiritually and physically.

But seriously, that man who has been hanging out in that place is now interested in you. Chances are he has been drinking since he woke up or for the past days. Do you really believe he is interested in the real woman you are as God created you or in the woman he sees in his drunken state? When does he see you and where does he see you if you start dating? The same times you met and same kind of places? A man taking you out “during the day” to meet his “almost drunk” mates to a public braai(barbeque) spot does not guarantee his love for you. When he picks you up or if you are driving your own car, does he have a bottle of alcohol in his cup holder? Thinking….
I know it feels good having all that attention and his friends treating you like Queen B offering you a camp chair and offering you a drink. Trying to give an impression to drunken men and asking for juice does not make them think highly of you. One of the friends keeps giving you a lustful eye and smiling at you. Is that really appealing to you or making your Father smile? You are so having the time of your life with this man who has just introduced you to his friends. Now he has had one too many and he whispers in your ear and tells you he loves you. He also tells his friends he is marrying you.
Girlfriend, really now, are you falling for that? Is this the life you want? Ok let us assume he marries you, do you think he will drink lesser and hang out with you at home? Or the picture in you mind is of those pregnant girls in such spots with every drunken person laying hands on her bulging tummy? Does that fascinate you? Do you know there are impartations of spirits just by laying of hands? So imagine those spirits going into an unborn child.
Girl, no man who loves his alcohol is going to be changed by anyone let alone a woman he “picked up” in a drinking spot or club. That is the term the men use: Pick up girls. Do you like being associated with something that fell on the ground to be picked up by a drunken man?

Woman, know your worth. You are not worth being seen as a sex object, a drunk, druggie, a braai/barbeque  spot chick or all those names  men give to women they hang out with at their favourite hang outs. Most of the men are either married and not with their wives and those who come with “girlfriends” have left their “women” at home. See how they behave when their “women” call them and the “girlfriend” has this twisted thought that she will win him over. How will she win him? By drinking more, smoking 20 cigarettes in 4 hours and fornicating with him?
I know most of you reading this note, are not really aware of Satan degrading your value. You probably started innocently going out on a “Girls’ Night Out”. It starts that way and do you know what is called “Impartation by Association”? You catch on the lifestyle and you start seeing everything as normal. The next thing because you are not filling yourself with God these spirits are in you and there goes you value dropping like the Zim dollar.

YOU ARE NOT CREATED FOR MAN’S PLEASURE

It saddens me when I see a 14 year old girl standing at a street corner with a boy especially after 7pm. I once dismissed a meeting like this on our street. It was after 8pm. I told this boy that he is eroding the little girl’s worth. The girl did not like me for a while afterwards but she got over it. This is when girls get this twisted mind set. Just because a boy lives far away from her and he came especially for her he loves her. Ladies, please let us stop Satan in his tracks to blind our little sisters, nieces and daughters.
You see the problem is that in our society, especially in South Africa we are not taught about how worthy and valuable we are to God. Children are not taught how to keep their bodies Holy to God and far from sexual immorality. The noise in the world is SAFE SEX! The noise is you are old enough to date when you are in high school. I was shocked when I learnt that you are only old enough to date when you are ready to get married.
There is no scripture that says that but if we go back to Genesis 2:18, God saw that Adam was serving Him alone and had no one to relate to in the garden. Adam was not even aware that he was alone but when God brought Eve to him Adam was excited and called her bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh (Genesis 2:23). God did not create you woman for the free pleasure of man or satisfying your own flesh. He created you to be a suitable helper in marriage. Genesis 2:24 says “For this reason man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife and they will become one flesh.”
One Nigerian pastor and writer says “God did not say a boy will leave his father and mother and be united to a girl”.

My pastor, Pastor Mosa Sono says “The most valuable thing to a woman is her body and the most valuable thing to a man is his freedom.” He says that women are willing to give a way their bodies to men who are not willing to give away their freedom. Woman, sleeping with a man does not guarantee him marrying you. Chances are he will not even marry you because he does not have to value your worth and if you have already given your body to him and you start bringing God into the already messed up relationship will send him to the next twisted and blind sister. This does not mean if you have already given into fornication it is too late to do it right for the sake of your love of God. Remember Jesus died for our sins so we can be reconciled to God (2 Corinthians 5:18; Colossians 1:22). We have all sinned and fallen short but when we repent of our sins we are forgiven and given a new start (2 Chronicles 7:14). We become new creations. Your old self dies and you are now hidden in Christ (Colossians 3:3)

Having had a child from fornication as well does not give you the right or reason to continue sleeping with the baby father. It does not even make your child less worthy of God. We are all created by God just like your child. You have fallen and God is next to you waiting for you to repent so He can hold you close to Him and heal you of the wounds you have experienced in broken relationships. Do not listen to Satan telling you that you are not the virtuous woman in Proverbs 31:10- 30. A man who has left you has no idea how valuable you are.

Being a woman on its own is of great value to God even Satan hates you. Satan’s plan is to erode you of your self worth and just making you live in darkness as if God comes last in your life by you going in and out of promiscuous relationships, finding every reason to drink, pick up nasty habits like smoking and getting so heartbroken you start being attracted to the same sex. He can make you think you are not so bad when you start seeing others worse than yourself saying; “I only drink during festive”. Remember sin is sin, despite the size the punishment is the same. It is death. Satan hates you for what you are capable of doing. Genesis 3:15 “And I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your offspring and hers; he will crush your head and you will strike his heel.
This was the punishment for the snake (Satan) after man’s fall in the Garden of Eden. Satan is trying to prevent God’s plan. If you are falling for his tricks you are removing your status of being Christ’s workmanship (Ephesians 2:10) and God’s co-worker (1 Corinthians 3:9; 2 Corinthians 6:1) and now being Satan’s help. You are not just helping him but breaking your Father’s heart who gave His only begotten Son for you to live a life of prosperity as a royal priesthood and co-heir with Christ?( 1 Peter 2:9).

Woman, know your worth. Remember that the Messiah, our Saviour Jesus Christ was born of woman. Abraham’s seed to become multitudes of nations had to come through a woman. For Moses to be born, end up in the desert where he met God and to lead the children of Israel out of Egypt, he was born of a woman and was raised by a woman to know who he really was. For the gospel to affect Samaria and turn them to God was the woman who was at the well with Christ. Though she was not named, what we know is that she was a woman.

Woman, know your worth and stop eating with swine like the Prodigal son who remembered that his father’s servants ate better than him after he had left his father’s house (Luke 15:17- 18). Stand up, wipe yourself and come back to your Father. “Therefore come out from them and be separate” says the Lord(2 Corinthians 6:18)

SETTLING FOR LESS WHEN GOD HAS BEST FOR YOU

God said in His word; “I know the plans I have for you. Plans not to harm you; but to prosper you.” (Jeremiah 29:11)

God said it and what God says is what He means. Now tell me, why are you then belittling yourself crying over a man who breaks your heart weekly if not daily? Why are you hoping that he will ever change? He has disrespected you from day one, what supernatural force will change Him. It is common for women to turn to God when relationships go sour. I applaud you for seeking God but what are you aiming to accomplish by seeking God? Restoring your relationship with God or restoring your messed up relationship that is not even within the principles of God’s word. Chances are, this man is not a Christian and before you met him you had a relationship with God. Maybe you were not saved then and due to this ongoing heartbreaking relationship you went to church and gave your life to Christ. Congratulations for answering to God’s call to salvation or coming back to God.
But, are you in God’s house for yourself or your relationship? Mhhh…. Who are you putting first? Your relationship with God or your relationship with your boyfriend? Are you not mocking God? Firstly you have married yourself by living in sin (fornicating) and now you are unequally yoked to this man (2 Corinthians 6:14-15). You are not married yet but you have yoked yourself to an unbeliever. Do you remember 1 Corinthians 6:16 says; “He who unites himself with a harlot is one with her in body and the two of them shall become one flesh.” A harlot is anyone you are not married to and if you become one flesh with a harlot you also become a harlot. In simple English a harlot is a prostitute.
Someone might say, I am not having sex out of marriage with this man. Ok I hear you, but is this the life you want to have by hoping he will marry you? Are you planning to be the one who carries through a generational curse of this man’s behaviour and short comings by  carrying his seed one day? Do you not think you are condoning and supporting this man’s behaviour and treatment toward you? People who care less about other’s feelings know what kind of people they are and find it easy to continue when someone is there through their mood swings. Girlfriend, stop wasting your tears and come to God where there is joy, peace and love.

I know you want to be married one day. All women do, even those who say “Whooo I will never!” Their denial is just self defence from previous heart aches. If they never want to get married why are they dating? We all have a desire to please God as well because God put that desire in every human being. It is just unfortunate that Satan twisted things and made sin look appropriate by causing men and women hop from one bed to another.
Going back to how we are raised, it was not forbidden to have sex as a young person as long as you do not fall pregnant or get sick. That is why so many girls become teen mothers. When you grow older it’s ok to fall pregnant as long as you work to afford raising the child. This has made it appropriate for people to fall in and out of relationships. It is not right!!!! The body is not for sexual immorality, it is the temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthian 6- 16-17). Sex was not also created for recreation or a means of measuring how much you are loved for the unmarried. Sex is a gift God gave to a married couple(1 Corinthians 7:2-5). He created sex to bring man and woman to become one flesh (Genesis 2: 23) and to pro-create (Genesis 1:28).
I am bringing sex up again because it is what causes women to loose their worth and settle for men who do not value them. Some women slip and end up in a relationship where they fell into fornication. Now that they have lost it to this unappreciative man they do not want to leave fearing they might be called names. Girlfriend, block your ears and listen to what God says about you. Remember Satan is fighting you for your worth.
God wants the best for you he says “Forget the former things, do not dwell on the past. See I am doing a new!(See Isaiah 43:18-19a).

Everyone has a weakness to fall for Satan’s lies and end up in his trap but God is here to rescue you. Flee from sexual immorality(1 Corinthians 6:18)  and resist the devil he will flee from you (James 4:7). Satan is scared of people who respect God and are ready to use God’s word against him. If you do not know the word you will not have the weapon to overcome Satan and sin (Ephesians 6:11,13- 18). God has given you power over Satan. Remember greater is he that is in you than he that is in the world (1 John 4:4)

God has a great man for you to marry. His God-fearing and God-loving prince. Whether you have a child or not. Whether you were a fornicator before. If you repent and give your life fully to God He will surely bring to completion what He had started in you (Phil 1:6). God created you with a plan and His plans are not to harm you but to prosper you (Jeremiah 29:11). God’s plans have no plan B. They do not change. “God in no man to lie or a son of man to change his minds” (Numbers 23:19). We are the ones who go in the opposite direction. Let God direct you (Proverbs 3:5-6) and quit allowing the world to dictate your life to you (Romans 12:2). That time you used to spend in those places invest it in spending time knowing God. Tell me what is the value those night outs added to your life except for the fact it subtracted your money and dented your value?
The great thing about God is that when you repent and come back to Him He removes all of your past, gives you a new life and restores all that you have lost. So instead of a Girls’ Night Out, how about a “Girls’ All Night Prayer” meeting? Imagine how many lives you will save and how many plans of Satan you will break then.

Quit looking into your family history and claiming curses from it saying that; “In my family all the girls have children before marriage; no one has ever been married or the marriages do no last in my family.” Start speaking the plans God has for you. Start speaking Proverbs 31: 10-) into your life. You are a virtuous woman who is far worth more than rubies. You husband is not a drunk and a heartbreaker but he is respected (Proverbs 31:23) and he has full confidence in you (Proverbs 31:11).

T. D Jakes says that you must be faithful in you singleness. He says: “If you are not ministering to His(God) needs, and are always before Him asking Him to give you one of His princes to minister to, your prayers are not being heard because you are not being faithful to Him. When you become faithful in your singleness, then you will be better prepared to be faithful to God.”
So serve God as you would your beloved husband. God has so many children yet He still treats you like the only apple of his eye. As one writer said: A woman must be so hidden in Christ that it would take a man to go through Christ to find her.

Woman, now you know your worth. Stand up and start praising and serving God for you are fearfully and wonderfully made. You are the apple of God’s eye.

 You are far worth more than rubies.


© Copyright 2011Written by Faith Monchusi
Written on the 20/06/2011 for over 9 hours