I stand to be corrected but if I remember well I have written a note before titled:
"Is He or She The one?" Many people get into relationships and
ask themselves those kinds of questions. I have asked myself such questions
before. That is before I knew God can help me realize who is wrong or right in
my life. Believe me, God does not regard any of your requests or questions as
feeble or as a waste of time. He says it in Isaiah 48:17(my favourite
scripture): "...I the Lord your God directs you in the way you should
go." and in Psalm 37:23: "The steps of a righteous man are
ordered by the Lord."
Quit trying to figure things out yourself and not be like Eve when Satan lied to her she never called out to God to ask if what Satan was saying was true. She let her emotions, hunger for power and her flesh to come over her and fell into sin. The same way a man a woman can come into your life and you quickly let your flesh lead you into temptation. Temptation via relationships is not only fornication. People get into relationships to satisfy the flesh in many ways: physically, sexually, financially, emotionally, socially, etc.
It could be that this person is just too gorgeous to let him/her just pass from your life. Temptation and disobedience cost Samson his life over the gorgeous deceitful Delilah. Or maybe he/she is well off financially, or is well-known, or maybe one of those most wanted man/woman and you are probably just sooo ordinary. Or the opposite could be true. Maybe since you are just too gorgeous, too successful or too famous you cannot find the right person because people are intimidated by your awesome fabulousity so you will settle for ordinary plain Jane or Jimmy. Sadly he/she will just be in your life for a free ride until you run out or get tired.
Not everyone is meant to be with a more/too beautiful, rich, famous or most wanted as they will always end up being invisible in that person's life. Everyone dreams of being with such a person. Every girl hopes to be married to a well-off man who earns enough that she does not need to work. Every guy hopes to marry an intelligent woman who is so beautiful as if she does not go to the loo (yes I said that). But deep down inside most will not be really comfortable with such people. In order for you to see if you are with the right one or not I have written below:
SIGNS THAT HE/SHE AINT THE ONE
1. You spend lesser time praying and reading the word to spend more "quality" time with him/her.
Anyone who moves you away from God or makes your passion for God subside is really not God-sent. "Resist the devil. He will flee from you" (James 4:7).
2. All of a sudden your clothes seem old or out of fashion for you when he/she is around.
If you all of a sudden feel odd in your clothes around this person, the clothes you've had for a while and the favourite ones you bought with your hard-earned money or your mom bought for you somewhere you won't mention you are with the wrong person. Darling, clothes don't make you they cover your nakedness. Be proud of who you are.
3. You start loathing your job and now looking for a "better" one.
Because Mr/Miss Someone you are dating works in a job you assume better than yours you now feel you are in the wrong industry or job description. Job-hopping is like sleeping around. You will end up in the worst job. Stay in your post until God moves you not a desire to impress Mr/Miss Somebody.
4. You ridiculously spend more money on things you used to save money on/from, eg. Hair, nails, eating out, etc
Ok, you used to be a Money Saving Guru and would never waste money on fake hair said to be human or nails that need weekly maintenance. You used to rather spoil your mom and buy food for her to cook Sunday lunch for everyone and now all your money is spent to impress. Watch your bank balance and save your financial status and leave that relationship.
5. You compromise yourself, your dignity, your family values just to please him/her.
You made a vow to yourself and God about your purity; you never dreamed of being in certain notorious hang outs and you would never dress like a "working girl", smoke or drink, but now just to 'match' and keep your mate you have made those aspirations and self-respect disappear. Dear young man/woman you will fade. Spare yourself for the right mate.
6. You no longer focus on your God-given talents and say you have outgrown them.
You used to sing, write, design unusual objects or maybe go for some sports training and you now all of a sudden call them childish or a waste of time. You have even ditched the children you used to inspire or stopped serving at church. The right one will support and enhance you gifts.
7. You feel inferior or out of place in the company of his/her friends.
Whenever his/her friends are around you wish they could just disappear or you try by all means to avoid them by doing the run arounds as if you are their servant. Ladies, if he has never uttered the "M" word stop acting like makoti dishing up and washing dishes while his friends' girlfriends are sitting like Paris Hilton. Gentlemen, her parents don't know you or your uncles, stop driving back and forth to buy the required. Whoever is hosting must do the run arounds. If they intimidate you, he/she intimidates you as well. Wrong person, wrong place, wrong time.
8. You avail yourself at his/her command caring less who you hurt in the process.
If someone really cares about you or your loved ones, they will never expect you to ditch them over their selfish needs. I've been there before. I would drive out to a faraway place at awkward times because "he seeks my company or care." If you really cannot talk with him/her to make her understand that you have a family responsibility or you are studying then this person is not for you.
9. You cannot tell him/her about your friends, family or how you grew up.
It is so great to talk for hours about people that matter or the most memorable, funny, sad or happiest moments of your life. It is just not easy to talk to someone who does not care. If you cannot even utter anything about it, it means you are uncomfortable and know he/she is not interested. If someone is not interested in how you grew up and who you spend time with they are not interested in you.
10. You no longer know how to laugh, play, have fun and make a fool of yourself to let loose (you become this boring, stiff snob).
This is the saddest. Once upon a time I was in a relationship for 2 years that drained so much out of me I had forgotten that I could crack jokes, do funny things and play like a child. If you really cannot let loose and be yourself this is definitely not for you.
If you can relate to any of the above points in regards to the relationship you are in, I tell you...it is not good for you and it will not last. He/she will suck what he/she is there for out of you and you will be so bruised it will take years to forget him/ her.
Time waits for no one and money does not grow on trees. Debts are not easy to get out of and the heart is the most affected. Proverbs 4:23 says:"Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." If you ever feel any of the above...Let it go and wait for the right one.
Learn to pray about everyone you meet. Ask God to reveal them who they really are and what are they in your life for. Most times people are just in our lives for us to introduce them to Christ or help them in other ways and we quickly rush into selfish relationships that end up robbing the soul.
#EXPERIENCEHASAVOICE
Quit trying to figure things out yourself and not be like Eve when Satan lied to her she never called out to God to ask if what Satan was saying was true. She let her emotions, hunger for power and her flesh to come over her and fell into sin. The same way a man a woman can come into your life and you quickly let your flesh lead you into temptation. Temptation via relationships is not only fornication. People get into relationships to satisfy the flesh in many ways: physically, sexually, financially, emotionally, socially, etc.
It could be that this person is just too gorgeous to let him/her just pass from your life. Temptation and disobedience cost Samson his life over the gorgeous deceitful Delilah. Or maybe he/she is well off financially, or is well-known, or maybe one of those most wanted man/woman and you are probably just sooo ordinary. Or the opposite could be true. Maybe since you are just too gorgeous, too successful or too famous you cannot find the right person because people are intimidated by your awesome fabulousity so you will settle for ordinary plain Jane or Jimmy. Sadly he/she will just be in your life for a free ride until you run out or get tired.
Not everyone is meant to be with a more/too beautiful, rich, famous or most wanted as they will always end up being invisible in that person's life. Everyone dreams of being with such a person. Every girl hopes to be married to a well-off man who earns enough that she does not need to work. Every guy hopes to marry an intelligent woman who is so beautiful as if she does not go to the loo (yes I said that). But deep down inside most will not be really comfortable with such people. In order for you to see if you are with the right one or not I have written below:
SIGNS THAT HE/SHE AINT THE ONE
1. You spend lesser time praying and reading the word to spend more "quality" time with him/her.
Anyone who moves you away from God or makes your passion for God subside is really not God-sent. "Resist the devil. He will flee from you" (James 4:7).
2. All of a sudden your clothes seem old or out of fashion for you when he/she is around.
If you all of a sudden feel odd in your clothes around this person, the clothes you've had for a while and the favourite ones you bought with your hard-earned money or your mom bought for you somewhere you won't mention you are with the wrong person. Darling, clothes don't make you they cover your nakedness. Be proud of who you are.
3. You start loathing your job and now looking for a "better" one.
Because Mr/Miss Someone you are dating works in a job you assume better than yours you now feel you are in the wrong industry or job description. Job-hopping is like sleeping around. You will end up in the worst job. Stay in your post until God moves you not a desire to impress Mr/Miss Somebody.
4. You ridiculously spend more money on things you used to save money on/from, eg. Hair, nails, eating out, etc
Ok, you used to be a Money Saving Guru and would never waste money on fake hair said to be human or nails that need weekly maintenance. You used to rather spoil your mom and buy food for her to cook Sunday lunch for everyone and now all your money is spent to impress. Watch your bank balance and save your financial status and leave that relationship.
5. You compromise yourself, your dignity, your family values just to please him/her.
You made a vow to yourself and God about your purity; you never dreamed of being in certain notorious hang outs and you would never dress like a "working girl", smoke or drink, but now just to 'match' and keep your mate you have made those aspirations and self-respect disappear. Dear young man/woman you will fade. Spare yourself for the right mate.
6. You no longer focus on your God-given talents and say you have outgrown them.
You used to sing, write, design unusual objects or maybe go for some sports training and you now all of a sudden call them childish or a waste of time. You have even ditched the children you used to inspire or stopped serving at church. The right one will support and enhance you gifts.
7. You feel inferior or out of place in the company of his/her friends.
Whenever his/her friends are around you wish they could just disappear or you try by all means to avoid them by doing the run arounds as if you are their servant. Ladies, if he has never uttered the "M" word stop acting like makoti dishing up and washing dishes while his friends' girlfriends are sitting like Paris Hilton. Gentlemen, her parents don't know you or your uncles, stop driving back and forth to buy the required. Whoever is hosting must do the run arounds. If they intimidate you, he/she intimidates you as well. Wrong person, wrong place, wrong time.
8. You avail yourself at his/her command caring less who you hurt in the process.
If someone really cares about you or your loved ones, they will never expect you to ditch them over their selfish needs. I've been there before. I would drive out to a faraway place at awkward times because "he seeks my company or care." If you really cannot talk with him/her to make her understand that you have a family responsibility or you are studying then this person is not for you.
9. You cannot tell him/her about your friends, family or how you grew up.
It is so great to talk for hours about people that matter or the most memorable, funny, sad or happiest moments of your life. It is just not easy to talk to someone who does not care. If you cannot even utter anything about it, it means you are uncomfortable and know he/she is not interested. If someone is not interested in how you grew up and who you spend time with they are not interested in you.
10. You no longer know how to laugh, play, have fun and make a fool of yourself to let loose (you become this boring, stiff snob).
This is the saddest. Once upon a time I was in a relationship for 2 years that drained so much out of me I had forgotten that I could crack jokes, do funny things and play like a child. If you really cannot let loose and be yourself this is definitely not for you.
If you can relate to any of the above points in regards to the relationship you are in, I tell you...it is not good for you and it will not last. He/she will suck what he/she is there for out of you and you will be so bruised it will take years to forget him/ her.
Time waits for no one and money does not grow on trees. Debts are not easy to get out of and the heart is the most affected. Proverbs 4:23 says:"Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." If you ever feel any of the above...Let it go and wait for the right one.
Learn to pray about everyone you meet. Ask God to reveal them who they really are and what are they in your life for. Most times people are just in our lives for us to introduce them to Christ or help them in other ways and we quickly rush into selfish relationships that end up robbing the soul.
#EXPERIENCEHASAVOICE
2 comments:
wow really nice and enlightening. thank you :)
Oh Yaya, am only seeing your comment now. Thank you for reading and commenting
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